A few times my business line was WhatsApp video called by men all from Asia/India who were literally performing sexual acts live in the videos.
At first, it was shocking, distressing to see and annoying. Then I realized that I did not in any way deserve that kind of intrusive and offensive behavior, nor did I invite them. The only reason they helped themselves to my private space was because I had literally opened the door to these perverts by putting our business mobile number on LinkedIn. And if someone really wanted to, they could find it on my website.
I noted their names, because some they proudly shared them, like I was supposed to be super excited to hear from them. I reported and blocked them on social media. And I also removed my number from LinkedIn. This seems to have solved the offensive sexual advances.
I receive at least 2-5 per day from each of these platforms: LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram inboxes aka DMs.
I also get some inside my blog comments. Hard selling emails/messages, telling me how they can get me leads and sales on tap without ever knowing if that is my challenge, or do I need their service! They also forget the cardinal rule of direct selling: That one has to Know, Like, and Trust you to do business with you in that kind of approach/prospecting. And digital Cold calling doesn't work period. Plus in the real world nobody would agree to meet a total stranger for a business chat. Why should anyone be open to having a virtual meeting with a total strager? Time is so precious, so gifting someone your time must come from a place of Knowing exactly WHY. In fact, I call it digital vomiting, however nicely it's put.
The rule of thumb is, if you cannot do/say something to someone in person, don't do it in a digital way. Don't be a laptop version of a nasty salesman. Let's end that cliche by doing it right. Build relationships and the rest follows. I have numerous examples.
This was more of a "Scam" than a hard sell - but I didn't see that category.
Someone spoofed me (posing as me) and reached out to job seekers on LinkedIn, got their email, then invited them for a text/chat interview. Here is the text from the email:
" We presently have an opening for someone who is willing to work from his/her residence as an administrative assistant. I looked over your resume and I would like to invite you for a virtual interview to tell you a little more about the available position and also get to know you better. We believe our success depends on having the best and brightest employees and helping them attain full potential.[It will be about 30-45 minutes chat session]
You will find attached more information about the job and company, please go through it and let me know which of the following times work for you so I can send an invite and confirmation details:"
Three candidates the scammers contacted consented to the chat interview. They were asked to download the "Fleet" app and create an account. As you can see from the image, they pulled my picture off of LinkedIn.
They had the interview and then they were offered the "remote" Admin Assistant role through my company (none of this is valid or from me at all) and sent them a FedEx package containing an offer letter with a check (with my company's name on it) for setting up a home office. The check looked real and it was for nearly $8,000. At this point, the candidates became suspicious and reached out to me directly on LinkedIn and we discovered together that it was a big scam. Presumably, the criminals would somehow get the victim's bank account number when they tried to deposit the check.
Some clues to help others avoid a similar scam:
--> Recruiters do NOT do chat interviews. This is a scam.
--> On the FedEx package the originating address does NOT match the "from" address. That's a clue.
--> Companies may send you equipment for your home office but sending a big check to a new employee that they have zero history with? That's a clue.
Be vigilant. Check your sources. Verify as much as possible!
My line of work as an Intimacy Coach is misunderstood by many male connections. They approach me with very little respect and understanding for the work I do. They provide the details of their masturbation seeking my help. I find these completely disrespectful and unwanted lines of communication. Moreso that there is no permission sought prior to them sharing such personal information with a stranger. I find myself being firm that it is unwanted information about the nature of the contents. On most occasions, my request is ignored until I block the individual.
I also experience many men approaching me via email, providing a sob story of having lost their wives in an accident or from cancer. They proceed to propose marriage. I usually ignore these messages.
I found that when you give attention to an individual, it usually gives the person confidence to continue the unwanted conversation.
I told another guy today, like him and four other guys all say the same thing. I'm widowed, I have 2 kids who I love, you have such a pretty smile, I've tried friending you and it's not working.. blah, blah..
First of all, I've never got a friend request, I would not likely accept it, until we've had some sort of conversation, and that is not a chat on Gmail or somewhere else.
This is my business account.. He says to me I guess I was wrong. I say to him you are only wrong if you are guilty of not taking me serious, or business-related.
I have a business profile on Facebook. About every 3 weeks, someone messages me asking personal questions: are you married? Where do you live? Do you have children? When I tell the person I am only on Facebook for business reasons, I get: Maybe I could be more than a client. Usually these advances include wanting to talk on the phone. There is no respect of any boundary I assert, so I block them. This sort of thing happens to me when I play Words with Friends. I am disgusted by men who use the veil of social media to pursue women. This is unwanted attention that I despise. I don't want to have to deal with this.
I've been a self-employed plumber and the move onto social media seemed an obvious add-on to my availability to potential customers. Plus I started to share movies of the shoddy work that led to many problems faced by my customers.
It seemed un-connected at the time, my ex-wife and I had been separated for 6 years at this point. But all of a sudden I would get several connection requests from attractive women, now I hadn't even thought that I would be targeted and it was only after the messages started to arrive, nice at first but quickly turned to begging for money and saying they wanted to be with me but needed some money to fly to England.
It was only after installing AI-powered Anti Virus and Malware solution that it was discovered that someone had been inside my machine for over 3 years, watching my every email and action. It is lucky that I don't take or transfer money electronically but the knowledge that I was recently divorced was only in private messages with my ex and her solicitor.
This was a real shock to me and I wonder how many other people have scammers inside their systems, watching, waiting and ready to pounce. I would not have told anybody about this but I saw a video on LinkedIn about SocialMeToo and, Me Too
I am a self-taught IT infrastructure engineer, as a woman in an almost entirely male-dominated career, I never expected it to be easy. In the corporate world, sure there are occasions where a male colleague has overstepped but if this is an accident it was always quickly resolved.
Since becoming an entrepreneur and putting myself and importantly my opinions out there I have faced the most extreme trolling and sexual advances.
At least 1 a day a DM arrives in my inbox saying "Oh you're so pretty..." and now I need to do deep due diligence on ANY connection I form.
In the past, this wouldn't have occurred to me and that's why I would accept all connection requests. Now I must be blocking 3 out of every 10.
It was a coincidence that led me to this website and the anger I've been feeling had nowhere productive to go.
During the lockdowns my role as a salesperson moved online, several (less than 15) of my once happy customers started canceling with me without explanation. I work in a big multi-level marketing franchise and it turned out that another agent who was both white and plays on being English had picked up my customers!!
Then, as we've moved back into the real world, those customers haven't come back but my normal sales have returned. I don't want to play the race card but CLEARLY, something about my colour didn't transfer online.
£850 passive income a month worth!
I used to fly search and rescue as a female pilot. There aren't many of us. I was constantly asked where I was sleeping by my fellow pilots and asked if I wanted them to spend the night with me when we were out of town on a search.
It was super creepy. I started my career at 20 so I was very very young and I realized that they were used to harassing women not only for sex but to make women feel uncomfortable so they would quit as pilots.
It was an abuse of power and sexual harassment.
A connection request was made by a female on LinkedIn and within 2 messages she was asking all manner of personal information. I said I was going to sleep and to try me tomorrow. Luckily she didn't bother
